The Children Are The Future-Cubs Minor League Update Sponsored by Bring America out of the Darkness (See what I did There?)PAC Brought to you by Joe Ricketts

Iowa

Did not play. Probably because of Obama.

Smokies

Also did not play. This only proves that Barack Hussein Obama will stop at NOTHING to keep the white man from playing baseball. Tradition means nothing to this socialist Nazi.

Daytona

Postponed. Can America really afford 4 more years of canceled minor league games? This kind of shit wouldn't happen under Mitt Romney.

Peoria

Michael Jensen worked 5 innings and gave up 4 runs but they were all unearned. Kind of like a certain President who hasn't earned shit his entire life. Zeke DeVoss must adhere to liberation theology because he decided to liberate himself from the responsibility of hitting and went 0-3. 

 

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