The 2012 Cubs are about to jump the shark. Sending Jeff Samardzija to the mound is about as desperate an idea as when TV shows add Ted McGinley or have the Very Special Pregant Woman Gives Birth in a Stopped Elevator episode in an effort to boost ratings. The lineup that Sveum has constructed to stop the Cubs from going …
Looking Back on Opening Day
Yesterday was my 15th straight Opening Day, and if I recall correctly, the 15th straight year I have frozen my ass off at Wrigley Field for the first game of the year. To be fair, I'm sure there has been a somewhat warm Opening Day among those 15 years, but I sure as hell can't remember when they happened. Yesterday …
OV 2012 Predictions: An Attempt at Unrediscreditation
What kind of a discredited blog would we be if we didn't occasionally put our collective butts on the line by making wild and highly improbable predictions about a 162 game season? We'll see which one of us is most scarily accurate and which of us is most hilariously wrong. The winner gets their OV salary doubled. The loser, of course, …
Why Won’t ESPN Leave Steve Bartman Alone?
It's March Madness and everyone is doing brackets. Lots of people are taking part in an office or family pool, and are all pissed off about the state of their actual NCAA brackets. Others are using this time to create their own versions of a tournament. The Cubs did their bunting tournament, Sarah Spain over at espnW put together a …
Ask OV: Cubs Fans Anxiously Waiting to Watch [Insert Name] in Centerfield vs. Red Sox
The questions have been rolling in ever since our debut of Ask OV last week so we are definitely going to have to hire an intern or something. I mean, first I had to do the Facepalm yesterday and now this. It's gotten to the point where I'm thinking of bringing MB back on board (at half-pay, naturally). But for …
Daily Facepalm 3.22.12
Practice Game Recap Not applicable. But Paul Maholm didn't get rocked by the Giants' A ball team. So there's that. It's Gordo's World and We're Just Living In It Today Gordo speculates that whoever loses out in the Great Cubs Rotation Chase of 2012 will somehow be a valuable trade commodity. To be clear, he thinks that a pitcher that …
Travis Wood is to Pitching as Natalie Wood is to Swimming
Travis Wood sucks. He started the day with a 20.50 ERA. He was spotted a 7-0 lead before he took the mound. He left after allowing the game to be tied by the 3rd inning. His ERA now stands at 25.07. Don't talk to me about small sample sizes. He blows.
Ask OV: Questions About Bleachers, Breasts, Beer, and, For Some Reason…John Elway and the 1979 Royals
Today we are excited to start another new feature where we will answer our readers' questions. Of course, since this is the first installment, we haven't had any questions actually submitted to us. That would be a problem for a lesser blog, but not for one as discredited as we are. Occasionally, people will find their way to our …
Lower Demand Won’t Hurt Cubs or Ticket Brokers As Much As You’d Think
A couple of days ago, Doc Blume wrote an interesting post about the obvious lack of demand for Cubs tickets this year. There are still tickets available for every game on the schedule, including Opening Day and the Red Sox series. There are large numbers of tickets available for most of the other games on the schedule. That is all …
Garza and Cubs vs. Lilly and Dodgers (for 3 innings or so)
The Cubs are taking on the Dodgers today in the latest practice game. You can watch on WGN-TV, keep track on Gameday, or listen to the MLB broadcast in Gameday Audio. The game begins at 2pm Central Time. Probably. We really can't be sure. Cubs lineup: Kim DeJesus' husband – RF Asshair Burner – 2B The Chosen One – SS …