Cubs Fans Convening Conventionally Again

The Cubs Convention is many things, but different is not one of them. John McDonough’s template has been used for 29 years with very few changes, so for the 30th iteration, they’ll stick with what isn’t broken.

Cubs fans aren’t exactly known for their ability to roll with change, so it’s not like I can blame the Cubs. Here’s the schedule the Cubs have published:

Friday, January 16th

6:00 p.m. – 7:00 p.m. Opening Ceremony
7:30 p.m. – 10:00 p.m. Friday Night with Ryan Dempster, presented by Budweiser

Saturday, January 17th

9:00 a.m. – 10:00 a.m. Ricketts Family Forum
9:30 a.m. – 10:30 a.m. Cubs Jeopardy
10:30 a.m. – 11:30 a.m. A Recent Look Back: The Cubs of 2007-08
11:00 a.m. – 12:00 p.m. Meet Cubs Baseball Management
12:00 p.m. – 1:00 p.m. Meet the New Cubs
12:30 p.m. – 1:30 p.m. Joe Maddon & His Coaching Staff, presented by Wintrust Community Banks
1:30 p.m. – 3:00 p.m. For Kids Only Press Conference, presented by Advocate Children’s Hospital
2:00 p.m. – 3:00 p.m. Cubs Business Operations Update
3:30 p.m. – 4:30 p.m. New Kids on the Block
4:00 p.m. – 5:00 p.m. Cubs Family Feud, presented by Mastercard
5:00 p.m. – 6:00 p.m. What Lies Ahead
5:15 p.m. – 6:00 p.m. #CubsSocial
8:00 p.m. – 10:00 p.m. Cubs Bingo, presented by Budweiser

Sunday, January 18th

9:00 a.m. – 10:00 a.m. 30 Years of Cubs Convention Memories
10:30 a.m. – 11:30 a.m. Down on the Farm

They’re not even bothering to give descriptions of the events anymore since anybody who cares about them knows what everything is anyway.

The Opening Ceremony will start with a parade of middle relievers and utility players from Cubs’ days of yore and they’ll get more applause than they ever got when they were blowing leads or striking out for the Cubs, followed by embarrassing amounts of applause for guys like Ryan Sweeney, and then an all-too-rare sighting of a Cubs Hall of Famer or two. Then they’ll show an extremely creatively edited video that makes even the worst prior seasons look like unbridled successes and gets the juices of hope flowing once again.

The Ricketts Family Forum is strategically scheduled for the earliest slot possible on Saturday morning in the hopes that the snarky beat writers, bloggers, and Twitterers from the post-Opening Ceremony drinking session won’t be able to attend to make fun of Todd because they are too hungover.

Meet Baseball Management will undoubtedly feature Theo, Jed and for some reason, Randy Bush. I’m fully expecting Bush will set himself on fire in the middle of the session just so someone will ask him a question for the first time in eight years or so, like “Randy, should we call the paramedics?!” But knowing Cubs fans it won’t work. It will be more like, “Uh, this question is for Theo. I’ve been a Cubs fan for 40 years and I’ve been going to Mesa for the last 20 years with my son, so what I’d like to know is if you think the players will be able to focus properly on preparing for the season after Randy Bush just burned to death a minute ago?”

Joe Maddon will get to meet Cubs fans en masse for the first time, and I can’t wait to see the looks on his face as the Yellons of the world try to impress him with which crappy blog they write for and how much they know about baseball strategy. Since the bullpen was pretty strong last year, the comments will undoubtedly slant towards recommending that the starter get removed the moment they surrender their first hit of the game. Where the offense is concerned, I’m sure Ricky’s creative base-running that often led to comical outs on the bases will drive many comments recommending the use of bunts and “hitting behind the runner for productive outs.” I expect Maddon will address most fan questions with a folksy story about bass fishing or some shit that completely mesmerizes the fans into not realizing he’s not directly addressing any of their recommendations because they are stupid.

The New Kids on the Block will probably not be the now middle-aged former boy band, but at least that would be something different. It will instead be a bunch of minor-leaguers and/or rookies that will be asked repeatedly how awesome they think it will be if they get to be part of a team that breaks the championship drought.

I’d give anything if the 30 Years of Convention memories would just be a video montage of all of Yellon’s dipshit questions throughout the years, but it will probably just be a lot of pictures of old ladies wearing hats filled with so many Cubs pins that it’s amazing they don’t collapse from bearing all that weight.

The rest is also pretty standard meet and greets, autograph/memorabilia games, and panels with very specific and well-rehearsed talking points. Again, as per usual.

So, in keeping with the Cubs Convention tradition of always being the same, the Friday Night Cubs Twitter/Blog/Fan Drink Fest will go on as per usual. The plan is to at least start out at Lizzie McNeill’s shortly after the Opening Ceremony and, let’s face it, will probably remain there because they have alcohol and it’s cold outside. It’s always a good time.

Hey, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

Yellon Gets BOFA’d on Twitter and It’s the Best Thing

If you’re not familiar, BOFA is the next incarnation of up dog.

“What’s up dog?” you might say.

NOT MUCH, WHAT’S UP WITH YOU?!

Get it?

Well, BOFA is very similar and you can see how it plays out between Twitter user, and American hero, @J_Mendoza8, and everyone’s favorite bologna aficionado, Alvin Yellon:

bofa

Nailed it.

stephen-colbert-celebration-gif

hp_celebration

miguel-herrera-celebration-tres

UPDATE:

@J_Mendoza has acquired a new target: Journalist from Peoria, noted Theo hater, and John Barleycorn douchebag stereotype, Nick Vlahos.

jon-stewart-popcorn11

And Now His Cubs Watch Has Ended

My baseball family suffered the loss today of our most senior and most loved member, Mike Lagattuta.

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Mike loved singing. He loved Italian food. He loved teaching. He loved his friends as he loved family. And he loved the Cubs.

He grew up in the Wrigley neighborhood and he would tell us stories of getting out of school and going to Wrigley on game days to get jobs taking down folding seats in the stadium in exchange for being allowed to catch the last few innings of the game from the bleachers. I remember some pretty damn obscure players, but he baffled me with some of his references from the 50s and 60s.

By the time I met him 16 years ago, he had retired from teaching and was a proud season ticket holder in Aisle 424. We bonded over Sammy Sosa mashing homeruns, Kerry Wood emerging from a far-too-long barren farm system, the disappointment of seeing Randy Johnson go to the Astros for a package not much more than what Lynch gave up for Karchner and Heredia, and the glorious tie-breaker game against the Giants.

He used to tell me all the time about how he had bumped into Ed Lynch at a restaurant that year and told him that he should go and sign Gary Gaetti. After all the years teaching and mentoring kids in the Chicago public schools, I think that probably still ranked in his top ten most proud moments of his life.

Mike was with us screaming at Dusty to for-the-love-of-Christ get Farnsworth up in the bullpen before the 8th inning of Game 6 started in 2003. He sat staring at the field in disbelief with me afterwards for as long as Wrigley security would allow us.

He wanted to see the Cubs win a World Series so badly and now he never will.

I would talk to Mike periodically on the phone the last few off-seasons and he just couldn’t get excited over signings of Paul Maholm or Jason Hammel. I’d talk about how they were excellent buy low signings and they could be traded for better talent during the season, and he’d always counter with some version of “That’s great, but I’m running out of time for this shit.”

And now he has. And we, as his friends, will miss out on sharing the joy of a Cubs World Championship with him.

Mike was a celebrator of life and love and friendship and would never want us to be saddened by our loss, but rather celebrate that we knew him and loved him. But it is hard knowing I’ll never get to share that moment (if it ever comes) with someone who wanted it so badly.

Mike gave up his season ticket account about the same time I did because it was getting harder for him to get to the stadium so often and because, frankly, the Cubs weren’t worth the effort. Luckily, I got a chance to bring him to the last game of the year at Wrigley this past season where we watched Jake Arrieta pretty much single-handedly beat the Cardinals with 10 Ks in 7 innings and driving in 2 of the Cubs’ 3 runs. We talked about how things were looking up with Arrieta and Soler looking good plus the resurgence of Rizzo and Starlin.

But even as we talked about the Cubs’ bright future that night, he was still adamant that the Cubs sign an ace in the off-season before he got too excited.

It sucks that I won’t be able to call him if Jon Lester signs with the Cubs to tell him “I TOLD YOU SO!”

It sucks I won’t be able to high-five him after bombs by Soler, Bryant, Baez, etc. in the future.

It sucks that he won’t be there with us to dance and sing into the night if the Cubs ever reach the top of the mountain.

But I’m glad his last game was a Cubs victory. He deserved that much, at least.

I hope heaven has an awesome sports bar where he can still watch them.

mike cubs

UPDATE: Mike’s family has asked for donations to the Ron & Vicki Santo Diabetic Alert Dog Foundation in lieu of flowers. I’ll be making a donation and it really is a wonderful cause so I’m going to just leave the link here: http://ronsantofoundation.com/donate.html 

 

 

Joe Maddon, Cubs Manager, is Officially Official

Well, there you have it. Joe Maddon ——> Cubs is officially official. Reports are that it is a 5 year, $25 million deal. I don’t know who reported it first and I really don’t care to sort through a billion near-identical tweets to figure it out, so we’re just going to accept it as fact and move on from there. The Cubs are holding their press conference at 2pm Central Time where Maddon will get his first taste of facing the Chicago media, God help him. I just hope the contract is signed and notarized before that happens so he can’t back out when Ronnie Woo somehow gets in there and then Rick Telander asks him about Steve Bartman or some shit.

So what’s next?

The consensus seems to be that the Cubs are now “ready” to compete. Combined with Theo’s statement that their goal is to win the division in 2015, the expectations bar has been raised about as high as I’ve seen it raised for the Cubs in a year not directly following a playoff appearance. That usually means trouble in Cubs world.

Realistically, the offense is still a work in progress. It sounds great to say that the lineup will have Alcantara, Castro, Rizzo, Soler, Baez, Bryant and MAYBE Russell all in it by the end of the year, but of that group, Rizzo is the closest thing to a known asset as there is. The rest are huge variables. I’m sure SOME of those guys are going to pan out, but this year? The odds that they all start hitting right out of the gate are minuscule. There’s a far higher chance that they all suck this year.

Does that mean they’ll all suck forever? No. But they’re mostly rookies or extremely young 2nd year players and building an offense around that as your core is going to have its ups and downs. So the pitching better be pretty damn fantastic.

Well, they have Jake Arrietta right now. And they have all but assured us they’ll sign a top starter to add to him, so that’s a nice start, but they’re not exactly going to be trotting out a new iteration of Maddux, Glavine, Smoltz, Avery this year. Even if they never start Edwin Jackson at all this season, the rotation will probably not be elite.

So they still have work to do, but now everyone is expecting a division title or suddenly Theo and Jed are big failures. (And if that isn’t the narrative right now, it will be by June. You can bank on it.)

So while this is one more piece in the puzzle, I’m not rushing out to be a face-painter at the Cubs Convention while waving my It’s Gonna Happen sign quite yet. There are plenty of other people who are willing to do that.

I think Maddon will do a fine job developing young talent. I think he’ll be less apt to get out-managed on a per-game basis than many of the Cubs previous managers. I think he’ll have the smarts to deal with the media and the fans much as Theo and Jed have over the last few years. So it’s good. It’s the next step.

The step after this is a bigger one. Actual winning on the field.

good luck

Other thoughts on the Joe Maddon hiring from around the interwebs:

 

Hire Joe Maddon?

Joe Maddon exercised his option to leave the Tampa Bay Rays today and is now a free agent manager looking for his next job.

Almost immediately after the news came out, multiple reports from guys like Buster Olney, Ken Rosenthal and others linked the Cubs to being interested in Maddon.

Cubs Twitter, as it does, went apeshit. But Cubs Twitter is not of like mind on this one.

There is the YES-HIRE-MADDON-NO-MATTER-WHAT group, the Maddon-Is-Better-Than-Renteria-So-Why-Not? crowd, the Cubs-Already-Have-a-Manager gang, the Please-God-Anyone-But-the-Cardinals camp, the Who-Cares?-Managers-Don’t-Even-Matter club, and various factions that combine a few of those views.

I’m basically between Maddon-Is-Better-Than-Renteria-So-Why-Not? and Anyone-But-the-Cardinals.

I’m not going to live or die by this decision. Frankly, the shit-storm on Twitter has been entertainment enough for me no matter where he ends up, unless it’s the Cardinals.

The Cardinals with an already good roster that didn’t use or develop Kolten Wong or Oscar Taveras for the bulk of the year is scary enough, but combine that with a competent in-game manager plus their typical post-season devil magic, and the Cardinals scare the crap out of me.

As far as the Cubs go, the arguments for showing Ricky Renteria the door right now in favor of Joe Maddon are:

  • Renteria probably has never been intended to be the guy that ultimately manages the Cubs when they’re good.
  • While prospect development is key and a strength of Renteria’s (based on one year), Maddon has a pretty good track record (based on 8 years) in developing young talent while remaining competitive in a very tough American League East division.
  • He isn’t afraid to get unconventional in his in-game strategy, whereas Renteria has shown he isn’t overly creative, and possibly too in love with bunting. There are lots of examples over the years of Maddon’s creativity, but this one is one of my favorites:

“The Rays had already lost the first two games of the series [to the A’s], the offense has been slumping, and the Red Sox were pulling away in the AL East. So rather than throw Hernandez and create a bad matchup on paper, Maddon started right-handed reliever Jamey Wright, who would be making his first start since 2007. Maddon would then shift to lefty reliever Alex Torres, forcing Bob Melvin to either leave in his left-handed batters or pinch-hit early in the game.”

That takes some balls, and it reminds me of when Lou Piniella (the best manager the team has had in my lifetime) stuck Sean Marshall out in left field for a batter to get a righty-righty match-up late in the game while still being able to use Marshall again after for the lefty on-deck. Also because, like the Cubs, the Rays went on to lose the game where the unconventional strategy was used.

The arguments for keeping Renteria are:

  • He did everything the Cubs asked of him last year. Most impressively, he got rebound years out of the two most important existing pieces he had, Anthony Rizzo and Starlin Castro.
  • He speaks Spanish fluently, which is important since a high percentage of the Cubs’ young elite talent speak Spanish as their first language: Castro, Baez, Alcantara, Soler.
  • He is under contract until 2016 and was only hired just last year.
  • Replacing a well-liked/respected manager one year after naming him (when he had relative success) could send a bad message to the young players from the front office.
  • Maddon is great and all, but he’s been in Tampa, with the Tampa media and a fan base that largely doesn’t care enough to apply outside pressure during a season. Renteria has handled the Chicago media and fans pretty well so far and Lou Piniella also showed that even experience with big bad New Yorkers doesn’t always provide you with the ability to deal with the Gordos and Sullies of the world on a regular basis.

There is not much in the pro-Ricky column that makes hiring Maddon a clear-cut bad idea.  Yes, the Spanish thing is nice, but there’s nothing that says the MANAGER has to be the one speaking the Spanish to the young guys. Being under contract is nothing that can’t be remedied by just buying it out. Maddon seems pretty smart and may have just as much fun fucking with the reactionary Chicago media as Jed and Theo do.

Ballplayers see teammates, coaches and managers change all the time. Of them they like, some of them they don’t, but it’s part of the game. I don’t think Renteria has built up such a loyal intense following in one year that would cause a revolt among players when they’re told their new boss is one of the most-respected, highly sought-after managers in the game today. I just don’t see that being a major problem.

The big thing, to me, is how Rizzo and Castro performed under Renteria. Maybe it’s coincidence. Maybe it’s something that wouldn’t change under Maddon. I don’t know, but it gives me pause to mess with something that isn’t broken. Those two continue to be the most important current Cubs until one of the younger guys shows us something consistently. It is very important that Rizzo and Castro keep playing well (and still get better maybe?).

So I’m not all in on Maddon. If they get him, great. I think they have to at least see what his asking price is and their silence on the matter seems to indicate that’s what they’re doing at the least. If they don’t, that’s fine too. Just not the Cardinals.

Oh dear God, anyone but the Cardinals.

Giants Defeat Cardinals for NL Pennant

The 2014 version of Cardinal Devil Magic died tonight in San Francisco as Travis Ishikawa tore the head off, burned the corpse, and dumped the ashes of it in holy water with his walk-off three-run homerun.

In the aftermath, @BestFansStLouis was happy to find a Cardinals fan to provide the eulogy:

On a side note, I promised Twitter and Facebook that I would buy a Hunter Pence shirsey if the Giants beat the Cardinals, so please excuse me while I happily go purchase that spastic turd nugget’s number.

I will be able to enjoy the World Series. Thank DeRosa.

Chicago Cubs (64-76) vs. Pittsburgh Pirates (71-68)

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While the Cubs have done their best to help Pittsburgh out in their quest to reach the playoffs for the second year in a row, the Pirates haven’t done much to help themselves lately. The Cubs swept the previously first place Brewers, but at the same time, the Pirates got swept by the Cardinals. So now the Cardinals are surging and leading the division and Pittsburgh is now behind Milwaukee, Atlanta, and San Francisco in the chase for the chance to participate in the one-game play-in round.

So the Cubs (and their fans) would probably best be served by getting swept by the Pirates thus enhancing the Pirates’ record to give them a boost against the hated Cardinals and bitchy Brewers while simultaneously strengthening the likelihood of the Cubs securing a protected draft pick.

But the Cubs are playing guys like Javier Baez and Jorge Soler and other guys from AAA who have a chance to actually be a part of the Cubs’ future so you’d like to see them play well.

And if the Pirates can’t win a damn game against the walking dead corpse of the Cardinals’ roster they don’t really deserve the Cubs’ help. So fuck them.

Go Cubs.

Pitching matchups:

Friday: Tsuyoshi Wada vs. Vance Worley – 1:20pm

Saturday: Felix Doubront vs. Francisco Liriano – 3:05pm

Sunday: Travis Wood vs. Gerrit Cole – 1:20pm

 

Don’t Say the Cubs Never Listen to You

The people have spoken and the Cubs have heard the pleas from their fans. The people wanted change and times they are a’changin’.

No, Kris Bryant isn’t coming up. No, they are not getting rid of Clark the Cub. No, they aren’t adding better beer options in the stadium. No, Al, they aren’t going to lower your ticket prices.

But what they are going to do is make the Season Ticket Holders pay their deposits for 2015 before the 2014 season is over.

BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT WE ASKED FOR! APPARENTLY!

The Cubs sent out a notice today about their new exciting timetable for renewing Season Tickets (h/t to @riley_daddy for sending me a copy) that details the plan that involves current accounts to renew with a 10% deposit by October 13th. So, roughly right around the League Championship Serieseses.

It seems pretty bold for a team that still has yet to actually show that they can win more than 70 games in a season to ask for money so much earlier than ever before, but the Cubs insist THIS IS WHAT WE WANTED.

Per the Cubs’ message (italics and bolding is mine):

We traditionally have released the Season Ticket renewal materials in early-to-mid October. Our Season Ticket survey results have shown that Cubs Season Ticket Holders have expressed an overwhelming desire to add more time between the initial invoice date and final payment due date. The final payment due date will be January 13, 2015, which is consistent with past Season Ticket final payment due dates. Moving up the release of invoices to early September will add an extra month of time between the first and final payment deadlines.

See? We OVERWHELMINGLY DESIRED THIS!

Somehow, and I’m just hypothesizing here, I don’t think that when requesting longer time periods between deposit and final payment this is exactly what Cubs fans were looking for. I don’t have a copy of the survey question that would have given the Cubs this data, but I’d love to see the wording.

Meanwhile, this seems like if the Cubs asked if you liked the troughs and 80% said they didn’t, and then the Cubs respond by “giving you what you want” by removing the troughs completely and replacing them with a single pail that they empty once per game whether it needs it or not.

I will give the Cubs credit in one area here though. At no point during the ~500 word message did they mention the 100,000+ people on the waiting list that are ready, willing, and able to give their money to the Cubs if you don’t. I believe that is actually a record for the Cubs.

With Baez Coming Up, Shit is Getting Real, Yo

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Sometime in the nearish future (by Cubs drought standards), if the Cubs manage to win a World Series we may look back at today as the day the franchise began turning around at the major league level.

This is not to say that Javier Baez will singularly lift the Cubs franchise on his back Sammy Sosa-style and carry them to glory. It’s not even a declaration that Baez’s propensity to strike out at alarming rates won’t eventually send him back to a permanent purgatory in Iowa where he and Mike Olt can impress the locals with otherworldly power and AAAA contact ability.

But Javier Baez’s promotion signals the beginning of the flood of talent that is coming from the revamped farm system that has been the highlight of following the Cubs the last three years.

As Cubs fans that get exposed to Vine Line, we’ve gotten used to seeing a majorly hyped prospect come along once every few years at best. But this is different. Behind Baez, Soler could be coming in less than a month. Bryant could show up next Spring. Addison Russell could be next fall.

And we’re not even talking about Almora, Schwarber, or McKinney any time real soon, but there they are down in the minors, making their way to Wrigley. And behind them are 17-year olds, Gleyber Torres and Eloy Jimenez. Wave after wave is building to come crashing into Wrigley over the next few years and Baez is the first major one to hit the North Side.

His every at-bat will cause major mood swings. Every strikeout will send Gordo and the Gordettes off the deep end screaming about debt load, cash flow, cheap owners, and an “easy” rebuild plan that was bound to fail without spending Yankee-esque levels of money.

Every booming homerun will send Kaplan and the Kool-Aid Drinkers into orgasmic convulsions as they doodle 2016 predicted line-ups with hearts dotting the i’s in the names while trying to convince their spouses to rename their children Theo and Jed.

But the reality is, Baez’s debut and subsequent stint in the majors this year doesn’t have to be a life or death situation for the Cubs or us fans. Enjoy the moment, folks. We’re finally getting to the good part.

 

10 Oddities About the Chicago Cubs’ Payroll

This isn’t a Gordo cash flow story about the Cubs being cheap on payroll, nor is it a judgement on Theo/Jed’s fiduciary prowess. Baseball salaries are weird things because the final figures depend on more than just performance. Service time, the market at the time of the contract, and even past salary all play a role, but when you look at a list of individual contracts on a team for an individual year, some weird things are out there. I was looking at the Cubs page of Cot’s Baseball Contracts yesterday and found these to be interesting.

10) Alfonso Soriano is the highest paid player on the Cubs’ payroll. Even though he plays for the Yankees and they are paying $5 million of his salary, that leaves $14 million for the Cubs to pay.

9) Edwin Jackson ($13 million)  is the highest paid Cubs player and he makes more than twice the next highest paid player. When you consider that Jackson is basically the Cubs’ #5 starter right now, that’s crazy to think about.

8) Jason Hammel  ($6 million) is the next highest paid Cubs player. I know he’s earning it this year, but if you didn’t know about the Cubs’ payroll at all coming in to this season and you had to guess a player that would be the 2nd highest paid player on the team, there is no damn way you pick Jason Hammel.

7) Justin Grimm + Hector Rondon + Pedro Strop + Nail Ramirez + Brian Schlitter + James Russell + Wesley Wright total salaries = $6,574,500.
Jose Veras + Kyuji Fujikawa total salaries = $8,350,000

6) Minor leaguers Gerardo Concepcion and Jorge Soler ($3,866,667) make almost as much money as Welington Castillo, John Baker, Ryan Sweeney, Mike Olt, and Junior Lake combined ($3,910,000).

5) Anthony Rizzo ($1,535,714) is the 16th highest paid and has the highest value for a position player at $639,880 per fWAR.

4) Jake Arrieta ($544,500) is the 23rd highest paid and has the highest value for a pitcher at $363,000 per fWAR.

3) Jose Veras ($3,850,000) is the highest paid pitcher with negative fWAR, James Russell ($1,775,000) is the highest paid remaining pitcher with negative fWAR. Actually, Russell is the only remaining pitcher that has been below replacement level and he’s at -.1.

2) Nate Schierholtz ($5,000,000) is the highest paid position player with negative fWAR. Not surprisingly, there are many negative fWAR position players.

1) Even with pay increases coming in the next two years for Starlin Castro and Anthony Rizzo, Edwin Jackson ($13,000,000 x 2 = $26,000,000) will make more than both of them combined in 2015 and 2016 ($12,143,000 + $13,143,000 = $25,286,000).