“Daily” Facepalm 2/28/13

In Facepalm by myles37 Comments

All the muck that's fit to rake on this last day of February…

Good News!

Bleacher Nation's creator and all-around Good Dude Brett welcomes Clark Taylor into the world. I think I speak for all of us when I say congratulations, and also have him start throwing lefty because we definitely need some pitching prospects. Brett was nothing but kind to me when I reached out to him for advice starting Windy City Sports Wonk, which ultimately led me over here, so I'm thankful for that. Plus, my own first kid is due in 6 weeks, so it's neat to think that maybe one of our kids will see a World Series championship. I'm not holding my breath.

Bad News!

Starlin Castro has suffered a hamstring injury. It doesn't appear to be serious, but since he's a Cub, it will ultimately ruin his career, probably. He joins Ian Stewart and Matt Garza in the "injured in Spring Training of all places" group, and is ultimately day-to-day.

Regular News!

There are 30 contests left for the MLB Fan Cave, and one of them is a Cubs fan. Based on the quality of her movie, I really, really hope that she loses. I was hoping for a little more production value, honestly.

7th Inning Stretch

Apparently, this isn't what the Cubs to have happen. As much as you might want "peanut butter and crack," the Cubs are going to try to just have former Cubs and "Chicago celebrities" sing the 7th inning stretch from now on. It has been ridiculous how stupid and banal the stretch has been the last few years, so I welcome the change. If you want to keep the tradition, I don't see why you can't just have a recording of Haray Caray do it on the days you don't have awesome guests, so we don't have to listen to the cast of Jersey Shore or whatever. If it has to be former Cubs, I vote for Leo Gomez and Glenallen Hill.

J'Marcus Webb arrested

Well, I guess there's another thing that J'Marcus Webb can't stop. Webb isn't terrible in run protection (12th in runs through him last year), but is awful in pass protection (after all, he's a member of the Bears OLine). It remains to be seen whether or not anything comes of this. 

Minutiae

Angel Pagan had more triples last year (15) than the New York Yankees did (13). (Castro led the Cubs, with 12, second most in the majors).

Tony Campana led the league in SB by a player without a 3B last year.

A drawing of the Cubs' new ST digs is pretty dreamy.

 

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  1. Ryno

    Adam Schefter ‏@AdamSchefter
    NY sports-talk radio host said he would trade Revis for SF’s top 2 picks AND Aldon Smith. Why stop there? Why not have them throw in Iupati?

    Enable images in your browser, faget.

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  2. WaLi

    So Brett has a piece mentioning that the Cubs may change their logo. I hope OV got the Cubbie Facepalm in the right hands. That would look perfect on the Cubs hat.

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  3. Berselius

    @ WaLi:

    We told the Cubs that our price for the rights to the logo was $10 million dollars, but then we realized that was an insult to our best customers.

    By the way, WaLi, we’re still waiting on your $20m check for the OV onesies for covering your spawn.

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  4. Rice Cube

    @ Suburban kid:

    January 25, 2006: Purchased by the Chicago Cubs from the New York Mets.
    January 5, 2008: Traded by the Chicago Cubs to the New York Mets for Corey Coles (minors) and Ryan Meyers (minors).

    Looks like a trade that didn’t quite work out. Oh well.

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  5. Author
    Myles

    Rice Cube wrote:

    @ Suburban kid:
    January 25, 2006: Purchased by the Chicago Cubs from the New York Mets.
    January 5, 2008: Traded by the Chicago Cubs to the New York Mets for Corey Coles (minors) and Ryan Meyers (minors).

    Looks like a trade that didn’t quite work out. Oh well.

    Meyers is only 27, he’s just hitting his prime (as a real estate agent in Arizona)

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  6. Suburban kid

    Rice Cube wrote:

    @ Suburban kid:
    January 25, 2006: Purchased by the Chicago Cubs from the New York Mets.
    January 5, 2008: Traded by the Chicago Cubs to the New York Mets for Corey Coles (minors) and Ryan Meyers (minors).

    Looks like a trade that didn’t quite work out. Oh well.

    I’m confused by the lack of Hendry bashing over the last few years.

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  7. Suburban kid

    Need a new fantasy baseball team name. GBTS gave me one once: Busty Poser. That was awesome. Last year I was just Maximum Snark. I need something with more zazzle this year…

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  8. Mucker

    @ Suburban kid:
    Coming up with a fantasy team name is like coming up with a band name, it’s very difficult. Here’s some Cubs inspired names:

    Garza Strip
    Soler Powered
    Vogelbach to the Future
    B Jax Meoff

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  9. Author
    Myles

    Castrointestinal Disorder
    Fuh Kyuji Fujikawa
    Don’t Shoot the Clevenger
    Baker’s Dozen (trips to the DL)
    Sister Christian Villaneuva

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  10. josh

    Samardzija’s Fellardzija’s
    The Rotting Corpse of Alfonso Soriano
    The Ricketts are Chirping
    Jackson’s Gotta Brand New Swing
    Please Make It Stop (Registered Trademark of Chicago Cubs Baseball)

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  11. Suburban kid

    I liked Mucker’s and Myles’s suggestions. In fact, there’s too many good ones to decide. I’m leaning toward Soler Powered or Castrointestinal Disorder but I also like Don’t Shoot the Clevenger and Vogelbach to the Future.

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  12. Mucker

    @ josh:
    You win Josh. I was trying for about 20 minutes to find something that rhymed with Samardzija. I almost spit coke out my nose reading that one.

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  13. WenningtonsGorillaCock

    My fantasy name last season was Koyie Hill’s Fingers. I finished second to last (dying laughing)

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